The New Zombie Survival Guide

How to Survive the apocalypse

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Know Your Class

Before the outbreak, society was split into three social groups; upper middle and lower class. Now there are four dominate castes that everyone alive is assigned to.

Heavies: A heavy is a person who can hold multiple items with large amounts of weight. They put the group on their back and make sure that everyone is ready for anything. This group is populated by sporty people and bodybuilders.

Sweepers: A sweeper is a gun wielding, line keeping grunt. They are the backbone of the survivors and are the most versatile. They can be trained with any form of weaponry and can be placed in almost any situation and win. This is populated by very social people and hunters.

Eyes: An eye is a long range weapons master, or sniper. They are trained to spot any movement from any distance and can easily take anything down with surgical precision. They make their weapon an extension of body and can become emotionally attached to their firearm of choice. These people map out battlefields and watch the body count, moving and dead. These people are a blessing and a curse because grudges can be mortal with these them. This is filled with loners and very religious people.

Grave Diggers: This is the miscellaneous category ranging from odd jobs to body burning. These are the average people that have no weapon skills whatsoever and stick to their base of operations. This caste has the highest population of non-combatants and is the most important to the infrastructure of a post apocalyptic society. Their roles can seem meaningless to them and because of this the suicide rate is extremely high.

Which one are you?

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urbanuss asked: Dude, when the lump are you announcing your new admin?

What do you mean?

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Population of the Living

When the end has started and all is lost, always remember to stay together. More of the living is always a good thing, but a larger population of can also cause an out break. When choosing a group for a task use this as a guideline.

Scouting: When out exploring the wonderful wasteland we called civilization, take 2-3 that tread lightly and are quick of feet. Any more and the party could be found and killed, any less and you might lose the brave soul that you carelessly gave to the open jaws of the dead.

Scavenging: When your supplies run low, and they will, you need to be ready for some heavy lifting. Take 5-6 people, two heavies and the rest are sweepers. Set them up with close range weapons and backpacks for the maximum increase for your supplies.

Sweeping: If you need to clear an area of the dead, be prepared. Get a group of 6-8 sweepers with enough ammunition to stand their ground for as long as they need to. Give them long, mid and short range weapon.

If your numbers do not reach this criteria, it’s okay. Supplement your people with more weaponry. If you do not have either of these, God help you.

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Tips for the Apocalypse

When creating a plan for an escape; quadruple check your situation and put in factors like buildings, cars, zombies, choke points and safe areas.

After doing this, make sure to check the “X” factors like how many hours of daylight are left and chances of alerting the horde to your location. 

Keep to the shadows, stay quite and keep calm.

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Classifying the Apocalypse

Class 1: 10-50 zombies

In a Class 1, almost all conflicts with the undead will be a civilian matter. The threat is minor but can quickly become out of hand if not treated seriously. Keep your doors and windows locked and stay inside if possible. If you must go outside, take a LEGAL weapon with you and stay away from big cities. If the police catch you with an arsenal in your car, you will probably get arrested an you do not want to be stuck in a cell with the undead breaking down the door.

If the severity of the situation escalates, the local law enforcement will almost always step in to quell the infection. Watch for signs of a government shut down of the story. If you see an increase in homicide/suicides in another area or a disease outbreak like the Spanish Flu or Mad Cow Disease. Deaths will be in the tens and twenties and will be quickly covered up.

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Anonymous asked: I unfollowed you because your spelling is ATROCIOUS!!! Seriously though, work on it. Please.

I will try to, but I think that this is a little odd. Instead of unfollowing me, correct my grammar where it is needed. It would be very appreciated if you rethink your action, but thanks for following me in the first place.  

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Tips for the Apocalypse

If you are escaping to a water source, landlocked or not, take to these rules.

  • Make sure you have enough supplies: Many a weary sailor has starved on his artificial island while the undead crowd the shores.
  • Plan an exit: If mother nature catches you off guard and tips your boat, make sure you know how to get out of the sure to be zombie infested waters.
  • Watch your anchors: Zombies have almost no dexterity what so ever, but water negates this effect. If you see your line is moving but not from the wind, cut it out. You would rather drift than live with the fishes.

Follow these rules and you can avert a watery afterlife.

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